saulrosenbaum.com / Monkey, Monkey, Monkey

Three weeks ago, at the local Wawa, I discovered that the folks who make Red-Bull, released a sugar-free version. Now I’ve never been a huge Red-Bull fan, but sugar-free Red-Bull sounded like the ‘sirens song’ to me.. so I bought a can.

Now a few weeks later, I feel that the Wawa cashier should have given me my first taste for free… needless to say I’m hooked, Caffeine addiction isn’t anything particularly new to me, but it is a monkey that I’ve beaten off my back more than a few times. When I was dot-coming, I could consume a twenty-four pack of Diet Coke in a single day, The ‘lift’ I was getting from all that soda doesn’t even compare to the ‘kick’ I’m now getting from a single SFRB, that being the case, logic would suggest that I’m not dealing with common caffeine, but some type of ‘uber-caffeine’, chemically altered to not only increase kick, but to increase the additive nature as well. My monkey was now stronger and more efficient.

Something so strong, so new, so addictive, you’d think that they’d be selling it on every street corner, but that isn’t the case, my SFRB is a ‘boutique beverage’, a ‘designer drink’, and only available in a select few places. I have a map, and some colored pins… and I think everything is going to be okay…

Hello, my name is Saul…